Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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