a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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