i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize