If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
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He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
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Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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