god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
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I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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