In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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