He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize