Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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