when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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