Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
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