I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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