dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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