Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Are my feet made of real feet?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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