The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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