at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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