so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I love having hate sex.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
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he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
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When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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