I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
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We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
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Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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