Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I haven't been this sober since birth.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
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Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
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i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
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