Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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