She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize