i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
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I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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