That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize