Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Randomize