I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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