Moan for me like Helen Keller
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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