we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
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You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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