I will die if light touches me.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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