this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Come on in and take your pants off
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