Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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