i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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