I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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