did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize