Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize