im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize