Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Everything about him screamed your future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I forget how to act sober
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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