I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
worst night to have a conscience
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
How external is "for external use only"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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