The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize