i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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