my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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