2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
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It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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