plz talk dirty to me
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Alive.
So much puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize