so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Just puked most of my soul out..
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize