OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize