Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize