Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
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drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
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Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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