Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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