Buhtt sex?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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