Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize