you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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