i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize